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Sober Socializing

As the stay-at-home orders are lifted and restrictions lessen, I think about what it will be like going back to a “normal” social life. For people in recovery it can be extremely confusing knowing what is right in terms of who to hangout with (does it need to be only other sober people?), and what to do that can be fun while sober.

In my recovery journey, I admit, I have gained a lot friends in the recovery community and outside of the recovery community… Being sober does not mean I should just limit myself to only other sober people. I have learned through having friends outside of the recovery community the practice of healthy boundaries. This includes what I am comfortable being around, where I am comfortable going, and what type of conversations I deem beneficial to my life.

While I do not drink, I do not shame others for their drinking, whether it is healthy or unhealthy (in which case I just drop slight hints now and then about recovery). I know that just because I “lost” the right to drink, it does not mean other people have too. I like to keep an open mind when meeting and hanging out with new people while also maintaining the strict boundaries I need to in order to feel safe.

Being in recovery and “recovered” from the disease of alcoholism makes me a free woman… This means that I am free to go where ever my heart desires as long as I have the right reasons to.

As the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous (1939) states “But this man still lives, and is a free man. He does not need a bodyguard nor is he confined. He can go anywhere on this earth where other free men may go without disaster, provided he remains willing to maintain a certain simple attitude.”

I am free.. I no longer have the obsession or cravings to drink. With this being true, I often go out with my friends. I am always the designated driver, and I do not mind. I hangout with friends at concerts and music halls to see musicians and I always feel safe doing this. AND if I do not, I have the tools I need to talk to someone about it and to take myself out of the situation.

I am by no means recommending that newly sober people should go out to bars and night clubs on the regular.. I am merely showing one of the many miracles of this program that came from lots of hard work and a continuance of maintenance in my step work. AND I still HAVE FUN despite not drinking. I have even more fun than I would if I was drinking because I have full control of myself and mind. I feel safe this way and I get to be in the moment with my pals.

During my four+ years in sobriety, I have discovered many fun activities. I have gone to concerts, skiing, hiking, camping, boating, and many other outdoor/indoor ventures. I love being able to wake up in the morning and spontaneously drive two hours to a mountain and hike/ski it. Being sober does not mean that I cannot have fun! I have plenty of good times without alcohol and drugs. The best part is being confident in myself to be able to let myself have fun… And in the end, my happiness is the most important.

#COVID-19 #Recovery #NoAlcohol #FUN

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